![]() I have come to a point in my life that I am pretty sure that I need glasses. How do I know this? Well, I first noticed this when I was trying to read labels of medicine bottles to give to Ben when he had COVID two weeks ago. I noticed how impossible it was to read the labels to figure out he correct dosage according to his weight. So instead of thinking, "I better get glasses" immediately. I ignored this incident and went to the internet to find the correct dosage of medicine. It's funny to think that improving vision is not a priority on my to do list. But then I really started to pay attention to it when I went fishing yesterday evening with the dog. I went to Raystown Dam to target smallmouth bass, largemouth bass, and northern pike. I caught a small pike and noticed that I needed to retie my fishing lure because the fishing line was all frayed up. So, I began tying the knot, and then I realized I am having an awfully hard time seeing the dang fishing line go into the line tie of the fishing lure. I knew at that moment…. I need to get glasses right now. My vision is all sorts of blurry. I went home in the evening and told Eunkyung (my wife) what happened and that my conclusion is to go and see an eye doctor. She was shocked that I didn’t go earlier. It literally took me a fishing trip and not being able to tie fishing knots comfortably, was the reason to get my vision checked. Eunkyung is right, I should have checked my vision much earlier. It’s absurd to think that improving vision is not a priority. We should make that a priority. It’s like I keep saying, “Ehh, I’ll see tomorrow… I don’t have time to see today!” That is crazy. See now, man! But think about if we ignore how blurry our physical vision is, what about our spiritual vision. If we hardly pay attention at the importance of physical vision, imagine how much more we would ignore our spiritual vision! Yikes! I better get my spiritual vision checked as well! The thing is that improving your spiritual vision is not as easy as just putting some kind of glasses on. Spiritual vision takes a lot of work. It’s not just needing to pray more or go to church more or read the bible more. It is all of those things plus more. You have to practice the character of Christ, model His behavior. It is about being attentive to the voice of God through scripture. Read the word and do what the word says to do. But that’s not all either! Yes! There is more! It is about paying attention to everything that is going on in the world. It is about knowing what is happening in the world and instead of reacting about how we feel about the current events, it's about contemplating and wondering what is it that God wants us to do, even if that means it is contrary to what I am comfortable with. Improving spiritual vision is all about challenging ourselves to match our vision with Gods vision. This isn’t easy and often times God will put you in difficult situations that may change the way you normally think and do. Just remember if improving your physical vision is important to you, which it should be. Just remember that improving your spiritual vision is also vital to live a better life. A life that involves hard work and challenges. Improving spiritual vision is all about imagining a better world not just for yourself but for other people. Imagine the world that God envisions. A world that replaces words like competition with compassion; hate with love; and selfishness with selflessness. So, what is it going to take for you to improve your spiritual vision? In order for me to get better vision for me, was that I felt that I lost something that once was easy for me, that was tying fishing knots. So, what is it that you feel you lost, or feel that you are losing that requires you to make changes to have a better understanding of the vision that God has given you.
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![]() So last week on Thursday morning I found out that I tested positive for COVID. I knew it was going to eventually happen. I was just sort of waiting for it. Ben first got it from school (most likely, because that it sit he only place he is social or goes other than home.) Ben had it last Monday. So the doctor tells us that he is going to be staying at home for the next 5 days and then after this he can go out but has to wear a mask for 5 more days. I figured that now Eunkyung and I are going to being close contact with a COVID positive person 24/7 it was inevitable that we would get it. We weren’t too concerned with Norah, since she already got it, not too long ago, and somehow all of us managed to escape getting it due to Norah’s diligence of staying clean, washing her hands, cleaning up her area and being really attentive to touching her face. But, this is Ben. He is a lot less careful than Norah, so it was only a matter of time that we would get it. And soon enough Thursday morning Eunkyung and I were feeling sick, and we tested positive. Nice. So again protocol says that we have to quarantine for 5 days and then are able to go out after but having to wear a mask for 5 days. So right now, it is day 6 for my wife and me. We are able to go out. To be honest, I still feel pretty sick, but I have to get groceries, and take kids to school, and take Suzie to the vet, I got stuff to do. However, Eunkyung, wanted to test herself because her work asked her to be tested to see if she can come back to work. However, Eunkyung test still came out positive, so her work told her to stay home until she can test negative, which should take 10 days. And I tried myself, and as of today (Wednesday) I am still positive. So, few questions I hope I can answer for all of you that must be wondering, all about this COVID crap. First one, is my symptoms and how bad is it. And the next question is why I am able to be out of quarantine even if I am still testing positive. My symptoms… they were mild for the most part. First thing I felt was cold chills on Wednesday evening and night, then my entire body was sore and achy, and I had a massive headache. But Excedrin and Motrin really helped with those. I was heavily congested and a little runny nose in the beginning. I never got the sore throat or coughing until day 3 of testing positive. I never lost my test or smell, and I never really lost my appetite. I did find myself being often confused and easily irritable (still feel this way as of today). But that’s about it. It is day 6 and I am still positive. My wife, she had it bad! She had severe flu like symptoms. No appetite, cold chills, fever, coughing, sore throat, body aches, headaches, sneezing, congestion, runny nose, and a lot of pain. Eunkyung’s symptoms were very different from mine. She felt like this for the next 3-4 days. Only as of yesterday and now today, she feels totally better. She still has the coughs, but that is about it. She is still positive as of today. Ben didn’t have much of anything. He had a high fever for 3 days about 104.0 degrees, lethargic, and cough. But after three days he seemed fine. He is on day 9 or 10, not sure. He is negative. Norah, still negative. She had COVID a few months back. During that time, she was the only one in our household that was positive. She was really good at being clean, self-sufficient, washing her hands and face, and not touching her face. So, we assumed that she has built in immunity to it for now. So, why are we allowed to come out of quarantine after 5 days, even if we test positive? Well according to health experts, they found out that the first 5 days after testing positive for COVID is the most dangerous time period. That is the time when COVID is easily spread to other people. After that, it is not so easily spread to others, even if symptoms are still present. However, for 5 days we are told to still wear a mask because COVID is still present. Talking to a good buddy of mine that is an expert on infectious diseases and is a virologist, told me that I should be able to go out with a mask on and not worry about spreading the disease. He still recommends me not to be social in anyway. But he said that I can do worship, but should keep a distance away from people, and still be mindful of people who are considered to be the at risk age group or people who have health concerns. The next five days, means that I could potential spread COVID, since it is present in my system, but it is just far less transmissible to others. So, there you have it. I still have COVID… and I will probably continue having it until Saturday. SO, in the meantime, if I must go out, I am going to mask up and do it. It looks like my wife might be going back to work on Friday, only if she can test negative tomorrow. I should be fine by Sunday. Again, even right now I am still feeling sick, but I am feeling much better. Overall, COVID, not too bad. I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone, and it was like having a bad cold or mild flu (for me). For Eunkyung, it was like having a flu. For Ben, nothing. Anyways, I hope this was helpful information for everyone. Everyone, stay healthy and stay safe. God bless you all. ![]() Now I know Christmas is already passed and that most people have already taken down most of their Christmas decorations. But I do want to make you all think about something just a little more. And it is still amazing to me that the birth of Jesus Christ was almost forgotten on that night in Bethlehem. It crazy to really think about it…. The Son of God, the Messiah, actual God being born on earth was nearly forgotten if it weren’t only for the wisemen and the shepherds. It’s wild to think that the birth of God would have such little fanfare or even audience. You think, that if God were born, there should be a massive announcement, a parade, an enormous preparation, but there isn’t! And it’s not like this was a lowkey, unknown event in time. The prophets have foretold the brit of Jesus (God with Us) a long time ago, actually announcing a virgin birth and in a smalltown of Bethlehem. And even when Jesus was born, it’s not like God wasn’t giving the world signs. A might a bright star shining day and night? Or how about a choir of angels in a nearby field in Bethlehem? Don’t tell me that nobody in Bethlehem saw a bunch of angels at night just outside the city? And don’t tell me that a star shining day and night isn’t enough for someone to look up and wonder, that is quite “odd.” But it was…. Nobody took notice. It is as if Jesus had a birthday party and invited the entire world and only a few shepherds and wisemen showed up. I now wondered whether the world even wanted Jesus to come, and that more so Jesus came to the earth as an uninvited guest, someone that nobody wanted or even cared about. Now I totally understand that Jesus tells of parables about weddings in which people are invited but nobody came. Daggum sad I say! Seriously, Jesus, who is God, is born…. and where is everyone? Make you think if Jesus was unwanted back then, is he even wanted right now, today? But here is the amazing thing that we should all remember. As Christian we give our life, our worship, our devotion to the Triune God, the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. We know how important the birth of Emmanuel was back then and how much more significant it is now… for us. But what about the rest of the world? The amazing part is that even if the world doesn’t want God or even recognize the birth of God among us and fail to even recognize God in this world… God still came to us. Yes, that is the amazing God that we worship. No matter what, God chose to be with us and took a huge gamble and risk in coming here, even when a majority of people fail to seek the birth of God on earth. To God… it doesn’t matter the amount of people that may love Him, but each person that is eager to find God, means the entire world to God. This is the amazing God who came to us. A God who needs no fanfare, no attention, no parade, or special attention. This is a God who isn’t depended on our recognition of Him. The God who came to us, only is eager to be with us, no matter what. Whether we recognize Him or not He continues to bless us and the people around us and the world with things that give joy, love, peace, and warmth. God will continue to be the God with Us. Maybe we need to start looking for the obvious signs around us that point to the heart of God. Let’s hope that in 2023, we start anew and refreshed. Let’s start seeking how obvious God’s love, peace, and gentleness is so embedded in this world and in our personal lives. ![]() So, what games do your kids play at home? My kids are usually doing one of the two things. First thing they do is play on their tablets. Sometimes it is playing games or sometimes it is watching parent approved YouTube videos. The other thing they do very often together is role playing. It’s cool, because I love having little “LARP”ers around. LARP as in Live Action Role Playing. They pretend to be knights and princesses, or kings and queens slaying dragons, trolls, and other unworldly beasts. Sometimes they dress up, but mostly not. Or they will role play as being student and teachers in school, or role-playing camping adventures in the house, or a cooking… you know what I would consider normal stuff. But then I just overheard my daughter say something, that I am a bit curious about. I heard my daughter say to my son, “I am the moderator! You must listen to me!” What? Then I hear, “Ben, you have the floor, you may speak, but you have 5 minutes!” Umm… what? Then I hear, “You sir, are out of order! I am the moderator; you must obey my commands!” Uhh… what? Ok, so most of you reading this knows that I am a pastor at Ward Ave. Presbyterian Church. I am the moderator of the session for this church and now I just started being the moderator for the larger church as well in the region. My daughter knows what I do, she has been to plenty of church meetings and presbytery meetings and even probably listened in on a lot of synod and national PCUSA meetings. Now I know she knows that I am a pastor, and that I act as moderator sometimes. But I do not think she quite knows what moderator means. But looking at her role-playing activity last morning, I am concerned that her actions are only a reflection of my actions? I hope I don’t sound like a dictator in my meetings! I mean, yeah…. Norah’s got the pint of moderator, but I don’t think I ever sound like that?! At least I hope not! Also, why the heck is she doing role playing games with church and pastor! That’s not what normal kids do! Come on! Do like, cops and robbers, or knights and dragons, or housekeeping games, or just whatever that normal everyday kids do! Who the heck role plays church meetings? I know… apparently my kids… and apparently my kids think that I am just some kind of authoritarian yelling man in my meetings. Where in the heck did they get that idea?! So anyways, for today, Norah is the moderator, so Ben better stay within the boundaries of an ordered meeting. I gotta steer them into normal games here… maybe it’s time to play some “Guess Who?” ![]() So how long do you keep your Christmas decorations up? I know some people have already taken down the decorations. But I honestly hate to see when the lights on the outside get taken down. Christmas, to me, isn’t about a day, but it is all about the day’s leading up to “the day” and also after. I can’t reconcile with myself to just take all the decorations down now! I know traditionally, in the Christian calendar we take down the decorations in the church sometime right at the Epiphany of the Lord, which is just 12 days after Christmas Day. How sad! It still feels like we just put up the decorations and now suddenly we have to take them down again?! It almost feels as if we, as Christians, are saying, “OK, Jesus is born, now let's get moving!” I like it when Christmas can last longer. I plan on keeping the lights, and decorations up until the month of January. Now I might take the tree down earlier, since our puppy has a habit in trying to chew on every bottom branch. But Christmas should be extended, well not like in the case of retail services, or holiday deals, but Christmas attitude and feeling be extended. So, don’t just hastily and quickly take down your decorations, but let the lights shine in your house and in your neighborhood. Here in Central PA, it gets dark around 4:30-5:00pm, which is WAY too early and also quite depressing. Use the Christmas lights that you have in and on your house to be a symbol of “light in the darkness.” Encourage your neighbors to keep those Christmas lights on the house just a little bit longer, because it’s just nice to see some color and brightness during this time of the year when the trees can't provide color because the leaves have been stripped off, and the daytime light is cut short. What do we think? Sounds like an idea. More importantly, what do you think my wife will think? She’s asked me when I’ll be taking down Christmas decorations, and I need to find a reason or excuse for keeping all the decorations around, because it’s a ton of work to do. I wonder how long I can stretch out in convincing my wife that we can have the decorations just a little bit longer. I think what I just wrote there above makes sense if I tell it to her like that right? Well, everything I said above is technically all true feelings, now is that enough to convince my lovely wife to let me be a bit lazy. Well, we will know soon enough. Anyways, I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas and I hope everyone will have a safe and fun New Year! God bless you all! Stay safe, stay healthy. ![]() So, we found out that our little Suzie is not so very little. According to the veterinarian, Suzie is 15 weeks and weighs 40lbs. The vet called Suzie a monster. Makes me wonder if I am ready for when Suzie is going to be full grown. But I guess when we first got Suzie, I had that same question of whether I am ready to have a puppy/dog in my life. If you think about it, how many times have we thought that we were ready for something or not? How often do we think whether we are truly prepared for what is ahead in our life? You can probably count more situations of feeling unprepared than the number of fingers and toes on your hands and feet. It doesn’t expose our doubt in life, but more enhances our awareness of how unpredictable and uncontrolled life can be. Only more the reason that our dependance on God becomes ever more vital. Just because you are a Christian does not mean that everything that happens in life will make sense, and that suddenly worry, and fear just goes away. Following God does not mean that you are immune from sin and sinful behaviors, and that you will never make a mistake, or that nothing painful in this world can penetrate your faith in God. But what being a Christian, following God, recognizing Jesus as your friend, brother, and Savior of eternal death, and acknowledging the Holy Spirit acting around you means is that when you come into situations that you question whether you are ready or not, it is about having the confidence that God will somehow give you the necessary tools and answers to help you be and feel prepared. You may not see what the possible stressful situation can be beneficial, but maybe God has a plan and that only by going through the rough times in life, the stressful circumstances, is the only way that we become smarter, stronger, more confident, more courageous, and more compassionate. Do not forget as we are approaching Christmas, Jesus Christ is born. That is God coming down as a human, makes Himself known to our world. Christmas is a time to understand that there is a God who truly wants to be with us. Too be with us, in our world, in our life circumstances, to share in our joys and also our hardships. God really wants to be with us! God wants to be with us, even if He is not even recognized. God quietly entered our world through a young peasant girl, not a woman who has millions of social media followers, and the father to be an insecure, doubting, but loving, and considerate, blue-collar labor worker, not a real estate tycoon, or wall street icon. God was born in a manger, not at a fancy hospital or palace, and the only people to fully recognize God’s birth were wisemen that had to journey for 2 years to find the King. It only took intervention of angels to even get ONLY shepherds to notice. Yes, think about it… a CHOIR OF ANGELS FILLING THE NIGHT SKY and the only people to recognize this phenomenon was shepherds in the field. Heck, not even the innkeeper came to check on the holy family and newborn! The birth of God; Jesus, was largely unnoticed to many people. But regardless, God chooses and gladly wants to be with us… whether we recognize His presence or not. That is an amazing God we worship. So, Christmas is fast approaching, let’s make this Christmas even better, with more lights, more celebration, more gifts, more family, more friends, more cheer, and more Jesus! Jesus is our Immanuel, that is God with us! And if any time this week you question your preparedness of anything or that you wonder if you are ready for what is to come next, or worried about the future, just remember God is with you! God was with Mary, Joseph, and Wisemen, and the Shepherds. God was with them in all their uncertainty, worry, wonder, stress, and confusion. You are not alone in feeling unprepared, unsure, confused, and stress. With God’s help you will find peace, hope, joy, and love. Just remember, God is with you, really with you. ![]() Meet Suzie Mango (Suzie)! She is a 14week old yellow lab. I have to say, I can’t tell you which is more difficult, puppies or children. To be honest, children and puppies and both exciting and terrifying! Both are totally unpredictable, and both need constant watch. Honestly, puppies and raising kids are about the same. Both need boundaries but also freedom. But right now, everything is so busy, but incredibly joyful. I never imagined that I’d be raising a puppy. I love dogs, but I also had no idea what to expect with a puppy. What I learned is puppies are every easy to teach. Our puppy on the first day was a bit nippy, and we fixed that issue quickly with her. She has a habit of chewing things, but she has gotten much better (still can’t find one of my slippers). She has quickly learned how to play with the children, which is a huge relief. Also, she is well on her way at understanding to go to the bathroom outside. We have had a couple of accidents, but that is always expected. I remember Ben and Norah’s potty training took time and had some accidents. Our pup is really good when we leave the home. She feels the initial stress, but seems to handle it ok. She doesn’t have any accidents when we leave her alone or she isn’t destructive, only the occasional missing shoe (which is fine). I think she handles people leaving better than the kids do! We are doing things differently, just because she is a bit of an older puppy. We are not going to be doing crate training or anything. She doesn’t exhibit destructive behavior when we aren’t looking. So all that is looking good. She is an older pup at 14 weeks, so I think she just grew out of the puppish behavior stuff. She’s easy going, but still a lot of work. A lot of clean up, a lot of boundary training, a lot of treats for good behavior. A lot of practice here and there. A lot of experimenting. We tried to take her off the leash outside, umm…. She’s not quite ready for that… Maybe in a few more weeks. My only concern is that she’s always hungry?! I feel bad because I am only supposed to give her 1 cup of dry food 3 times a day. But she keeps looking at me, like the amount is some kind of joke. Totally opposite with my children, who I have to force to sit down to eat. That might be the biggest difference with kids and puppies. Anyways, nothing theological in this one, just a report on my life. ![]() Last week my son, Ben helped in lighting the Advent Candles this week. Right when we lit the candelabra, he said, “I’m scared!” Which was cute. I guess it’s a good thing to be aware of fire and know it’s potential risk. But really made me think about the concept of being scared or afraid during this season of Advent and as well Christmas. Normally, we think of Advent and Christmas to be a time of joy and celebration. A time that we get to drive around the neighborhood in the evening and enjoy the Christmas decorations and lights. A time that we sing Christmas carols and prepare the gifting giving tradition. But have you ever thought about being scared or afraid during this time? It’s funny because not too long ago (Black Friday) I bought a Ring Video Doorbell for the home. And I couldn’t help to notice how popular this item was! It was flying off the shelves in the online stores. Now, I got mine for purposes that I am tired of my amazon packages being taken off our porch and also as a nice way of letting guests come in and out of the house when I am not around. But I know the main reason most people get them, including myself is security purposes. Makes me wonder how afraid I really am and also how afraid others are. Makes me wonder that with the holidays within are midst, that in the back of our mind, maybe somewhere in our deep unconscious we are somehow afraid of something. But also, I realize that Advent and Christmas traditionally came into our lives in the present of great fear. Think about the very first Christmas, well at least from a Christian perspective. The first Christmas we recognize is the night of Jesus’ birth. Now just think about the amount of fear that proceeded Christ’s birth, the fear and worry that was present at His birth, and the fear that lasted after he was born. Before Jesus was born, Mary gets the news that she is have a son. This is obviously shocking news to Mary who has never laid with another man before. A young girl, now pregnant. This not only caught her off guard, but I am sure she was scared. Wondering what the social implications are going to be and also how her husband-to-be will respond as well. She probably would anyone believe her story that she was visited by an angel in the darkest of nights. Joseph on the other hand, find out what is happening when he also is visited by God’s messenger. He must have thought all this is absolutely crazy! During the birth of Christ, Mary and Joseph find themselves in Bethlehem, with nowhere to go. They couldn’t even get a proper room in the inn! They had no other option but to take room in a stable with the animals. Stay in the stable, being at the mercy of the cold winter weather, and also vulnerable to anything that may be lurking outside. Meanwhile, shepherds are out in some field get the most astonishing of sights. Suddenly, a barrage of strange entities appears before them telling of a Savior being born! These unexpected guests, put these shepherds in fear. Now, just prior to the arrival of Christ being born, wisemen find an anomaly in the skies above them. Something, that just doesn’t seem right. A star magically appears where there were no stars before. But is it a star? It’s not moving like other stars. And also, this is shining in the night and day! Is it a warning? Is it the end of the world? And after Jesus is born, the holy family find themselves in a middle of a manhunt. They must flee their home, their country and go somewhere else because Herod wants to kill the child, and hence has to order a death sentence for every child being born in the year that the star first appeared. The Christian Christmas story is full of fear, anxiety, and catastrophes. If you find yourself feeling like anything short of joy, then you aren’t alone. But at the same time, you don’t have to feel like the world is a scary, depressing, hopeless place. Sure, maybe, at the moment, it can feel this way, but that moment will pass. When Jesus was born it was surely a time of stress, fear, anxiety, worry, and catastrophe. And sometimes our world can feel the same. And sometimes our personal life can reflect this as well. But again, Jesus was born to bring hope and peace. Unfortunately, to get there hope and peace was met with uncertainty and even hostility. But if we learn anything about the journey of the Holy Family, from the time the visons came to Mary and Joseph, to the curiosity of the wisemen and shepherds, and even the quick thinking of needing to leave their country to safety, that is be resilient and persevere. You may feel that the cards are stacked against you and that the odds are not in your favor but remember with God by your side and you stay resilient, there is nothing that you cannot accomplish. There is a reason that Jesus is named “Emmanuel,” which means God with us. God never promised us an easy life, but God di promise to be with us. SO I hope you recognize this during Advent and Christmas. God is with you. God bless. ![]() If you haven’t read the “Part 1” of this blog, that’s the one last week read that because now I want everyone to put on their theological hats. Let’s take this story of a parent teacher conference as a metaphor about God’s relationship with the clergy and the people. If I were to assign anyone characters in this metaphor of a parent teacher conference it would be simply that God is the teacher, the parents are the clergy, and the children are the people. Now, I do want to clarify that by no means is this about hierarchy, ability, or power. What I want to clarify is that being clergy, or the people does not make one better than the other, however, the roles of such are different. But I do sometimes imagine that as a clergy we are somewhat responsible with how the people behave. We are not necessarily considered a model of morals or ethics, but more that what we study, what we preach, and what we command is about the importance of repentance, the power of forgiveness, the importance of living well, and the necessity of loving others and knowing that you are loved. From a clergy standpoint, if we do these things well, then the people will do well and the world will be all good, right? Well, no. And who even says that every clergy/pastor, even does all these things perfectly. Afterall, the clergy/pastors are the people too! But I can only imagine what that heavenly parent teacher conference may look like, if it would even happen. I assume God as the teacher, looking at the clergy aka. parents are probably saying some (hopefully) encouraging things and then lay it on heavy of what the children aka. the people are struggling with and whether a change of behavior is needed. When Eunkyung and I were meeting Norah’s teacher, Norah was super chill, just went to grab a book and started reading. Ben however was bouncing off the walls. Even at one point he climbed the teacher’s desk and just stood on top of it. Two kids raised the same, but totally different behaviors. Now, if God was the teacher, and the clergy were the parents, and the people were the children, I can only imagine, that only a similar outcome would occur! One person would be polite, reading a book, understanding the context of location and behave accordingly, while another person would be bouncing off the walls, climbing on the Tree of Good and Evil, eating the forbidden fruit, taking multiple bites. Even though the pastor says the same thing to everyone, but the results can vary. While the clergy are sitting in front of God just sweating! It honestly, just funny to think about. I do not think that God would be judgmental at all, but I can see God going over to the troubled and misbehaved and sit them in their lap and whisper words of kindness of love. I can imagine that God would tell the well-behaved child to keep going and continue to do good work. And God telling the clergy, that you can’t expect to be perfect, and you can’t expect people to be perfect as well. God would remind each clergy the simple rule that we often times forget. That is, “Remember, you are called to serve; you are called to love.” Love to well behaved and the not so well behaved the same. Love the ones that show you respect and love the ones that scream at you all day. When it comes with anything, whether you are a teacher, clergy, a person that has a position of leadership or authority, a child, or parent, we must realize that there are so many factors involved in how people respond to the message we give them. Not one person is the same, it's like we are all snowflakes, individuals, different, but all clumping together on this earth. So, never get upset or feel like a failure in your expectations of people around you. Like what I was told as a clergy, you are called to love. Not to serve, not to teach, not to act authoritative, not to expect a certain result, you are called to love. ![]() I had a parent teacher conference last night at Baker Elementary School. This is the first one I have gone and to be honest I was so stressed about it the entire week! Just because I am always hoping that Norah is doing an A+ job in everything. Not only do I hope she is excelling in all her schoolwork, but also that she is around good friends and not getting bullied by anyone. I was terrified because well, she’s my daughter! She came from me. And to be so honest I only pray that she has better traits than me. To be honest I hope that she has more of Eunkyung’s genes than mine! Sounds a bit harsh on myself, but I can’t hide how I feel regardless of my self-deprecating statement. Eunkyung is definitely smarter than me and works harder than me. Maybe I am more outgoing than her and maybe I get less stressed than her, and maybe I’m better looking than her. That last statement’s a dang lie… I know I married up. But I know what kind of student I was, and I know what kind of student Eunkyung was. And well, I hope Norah takes after Eunkyung more than me. When I was in her age, I remember my teacher would write the names of kid's names on a chalkboard if they misbehaved. It was an attempt that hoped to embarrass us. But it didn’t really work for me. And if we got in trouble a second time, she would proceed to write checkmarks by our names. I didn’t know what the consequences were about how many checkmarks we were “allowed” to get. Even though I never thought myself as a bad kid, I was a weird kid for sure. Even though I wasn’t getting in trouble in class, I wondered if we kept getting in trouble that means the check marks by our names would just keep collecting. And then would it be possible to cover the entire checkboard in check marks? I thought I’d experiment. Again, I didn’t know the consequences. So, I got in trouble for talking in class. My name is now on the board. And I decided for the entire day, I would break as many rules as possible but after about hour 2 I realized that in order to cover the entire chalkboard with check marks I needed help. I got pretty far but I know that I can’t accomplish this task by myself. So, I recruited five other kids around me to act up. I told them my curiosity and they were curious as well. Even while I was explaining this, I think I collected like 5 more checkmarks. So now, with six of us hard at work, the checkmarks kept coming. And it came to the point that the teacher got so tired of writing checkmarks she just told us to write the check marks ourselves. We got pretty close in covering the chalkboard. But now I knew. Mrs. Thompson would continue to write checkmarks on the board no matter what. Oh, Mrs. Thompson, if somehow you are reading this, I am so sorry! I was a little monster that day! But now I knew the consequences, it was a parent teacher conference. Yeah, the real punishment for me was having to let my parents know what I was doing in school. So… when I got the notification that I had to sign up on a day and time for a parent teacher conference for Norah, I was shook. I literally thought, “Oh no, was she testing the teacher by seeing if she can cover the entire chalkboard in check marks like what I did?” It didn’t dawn on me that most likely schools these days don’t have a chalk board, or that there are other more creative ways in punishing students. But I thought that maybe I have to do this conference because Norah got in trouble in school. For the last week or so, I was secretly interrogating Norah and staring at her to see if she has a “wickedness” in her. It was hard to imagine, but then again, how am I supposed to really know. I had to think, “Is my daughter living a double life? Being so sweet, quiet, polite, and kind at home, while at school just kicking crap all around?” Man, to imagine that she would be such a brat in school was heartbreaking. But nonetheless I just had to wait on that day to hear what the teacher had to say. The day came, and well, first thing I learned was that no longer were parent teach conferences only reserved for bad behaving kids, actually all kids are doing it. Another is to simply put; I had nothing to worry about. Apparently, Norah is super smart, super curious (in a good way), friendly, positive, and works well with all her classmates. Apparently, she is already reading at a 4th grade level and is able to comprehend more complicated chapter books. Apparently, she’s got talent in number and already understand fractions. Which I must say her understanding of fractions comes with me, because fishing has a lot to do with knowing fractions. Fishing weights and fishing lures all have fractions like 1/4oz, 1/2oz, 3/16oz, and so on. So, yeah, I have nothing to worry about. The teacher had a lot of positive things to say about Norah. I am so proud of her! She’s not just doing great in all aspect of school life, but she is an amazing help at home. Whether it is cleaning up, playing with Ben or helping Ben, or listening to Eunkyung and myself. There is one picture that the teacher thought was funny though. Apparently, Norah drew a picture of a family portrait about what we do. And in the picture was Eunkyung, nurse, Ben blocks, Norah on a tablet, and apparently me watching and screaming at the TV. With the words coming out of my mouth, “You got to be kidding me!” God has blessed her with talent and given her a bright start to her future. According to Norah’s picture that is now hung in her classrooms for all the kids to see, I’m not a perfect father, well, I am probably like every father! But I know she has a perfect Father in heaven. Who can guide her better than me. I trust in him and whether Norah’s knows it or not, it is her Father in Heaven who is guiding her every day and every hour. I like to think that. So now, I know I don’t have to worry about her at all, because she is in God’s loving hands. Now… I just have to worry about Ben. Gods got this handled, because all I can control is not necessarily how Ben behaves, but my volume when I have the urgency to scream at the football game on TV. Oh, I asked Norah why she didn’t draw me preaching at church and she said she didn’t know how to draw that. Nice. |
AuthorHey this is Rev. Brian Choi's random thought throughout my week. Most of this stuff, will probably be about family, church, fishing, music, movies, food, whatever I think of, hopefully it will have some sort of theological reflection (maybe). Archives
January 2023
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